Selfishness places personal needs and gain above everyone else, while selflessness puts the needs of others ahead of one's own. In Christianity, selfishness is the root of sin—putting one’s own will, desires, and pride above God and others—whereas selflessness is the path of grace, humility, and sacrificial love modeled by Jesus Christ.
Here is a short devotion on the subject...
Selfish to Selfless
Our default setting is selfishness.
Don’t believe it? Try hanging out with a toddler for a day.
Toddlers want what they want, and they want it now. Toddlers will fight (and sometimes bite) to maintain dominion over their prized possessions. Toddlers have little concern for schedules, agendas, or perfectly white walls.
The good news about toddlers—and people in general—is that they have the capacity to change into selfless people as they grow. But, if toddlers aren’t lovingly redirected and taught how to consider others, that selfishness will continue.
So if we’re naturally self-centered humans, how do we train our minds not to default to selfishness?
The Bible encourages us to model our lives after Jesus…
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus…” Philippians 2:3-5 NIV
Jesus didn’t leverage His authority for personal advantage—power, pleasure, control, or comfort—but took on the nature of a servant.
Jesus spent His time investing in others. Jesus focused His attention on helping others. Jesus gave up His own life for others.
If you find yourself becoming self-obsessed, self-indulgent, or even a little self-righteous, consider asking God for His help.
- Ask Him to help you see people the way He does.
- Ask Him to use any knowledge you gain to love Him and serve others.
- Ask Him to put opportunities in your path to lead others toward Him.
The Word of God, the Holy Spirit, and relationships with other believers are what refine our hearts. And with God’s help, we can change our tendency from living selfishly into living selflessly.
Every day we face powerful battles within our heart. It is not always visible, but it shapes every decision we make. Those decision are driven either by selfish ambition or by selfless direction that God calls us to walk in. At times our motives can be hidden behind deception,-masked by attitudes and behaviors that appear right on the surface.
But God is not concerned with what we do, he is more concerned with the heart behind it.
How do you know if your ambition to land that promotion, buy that house, or lose 50 pounds is selfish or godly? The truth is, our ambitions are almost always a mixed bag. Jeremiah 17:9 says that the human heart is desperately wicked, and so I'm not sure it's even possible for any of us to ever have a perfectly pure motive. So how can we decide if our mix of selfish and godly ambitions should keep us from pursuing a goal?
Here's a simple 5-step process that can help make this call.
- Write down one of your goals.
- Borrow David's prayer from Psalm 139. Ask the Lord to search your heart and reveal your motives for your goal.
- Write down every single reason you can think of for why you want to achieve that goal, from the super-spiritual to the superficial.
- Write the letter G next to the motives you believe are godly, and S next to the ones you think are selfish, and a question mark next to the ones that you're honestly not so sure about.
- Finally, share your list with a fellow Christian. Ask them to help you discern the balance of the motives in your heart. If your spirit-filled friend believes that your motives are mostly self-serving, drop the goal. But if your primary ambition is clearly God's glory and the good of others, move forward in faith. Don't let a mixed bag keep you from the good works God has prepared in advance for you to do.
Jesus didn’t leverage His authority for personal advantage, power, or pleasure, control or comfort – but to serve others. When you take the time to notice, serve, or encourage others, you are magnifying Christ as you live out your faith.



